The Art of Disappointment

I'm sorry I'm not as fashionably expert as the other girls out there. I'm sorry there's this sad, poetic, insecure, awkward girl in front of you instead. I, who doesn't even give a shit about wearing the same clothes all over again, who doesn't even know how to put on the most basic make up on my face, and who just owns two damn pairs of shoes, is the girl you are all pushed to see today.

I'm sorry I'm not as good as you think I am. I'm sorry that I did not give a five-peso coin to the homeless child roaming around the streets. Maybe you thought I was some angel who'd pity anyone and everyone. Maybe you thought I have a golden heart. Maybe you thought I'd save the trees, the koalas, the lost seal in the ocean; but, the truth is, I'm not as influential as you think I am.

I'm sorry, I can never meet your expectations. Maybe, you thought I'd travel the world one day, or that I might be able to publish my writings sooner, or that maybe I'd become some famous name in the big screen; but spoiler alert—I did not become any of that. I don't think it's because I didn't try; I think it's because I wasn't supposed to be legendary in the first place.

I'm sorry, this is just me. I'm sorry that the only thing I'm ever good at is saying sorry. I don't think I can ever change. I don't think I will ever choose to change.

I'm sorry, I can never meet your expectations. Maybe, you thought I'd travel the world one day, or that I might be able to publish my writings sooner, or that maybe I'd become some famous name in the big screen; but spoiler alert—I did not become any of that. I don't think it's because I didn't try; I think it's because I wasn't supposed to be legendary in the first place.

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#art #words #disappointment #artofdisappointment #insecurities #literarynarrative